


Our Other Inquisitor

by TinaOnTheAstralPlains



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fade Dream(s), Fluff, Grief/Mourning, In the Fade, Mild Smut, Multiple Inquisitors, Romance, The Fade
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2016-07-02
Packaged: 2018-04-05 04:55:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4166703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinaOnTheAstralPlains/pseuds/TinaOnTheAstralPlains
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After months of nightly dreams of sharing his bed with a woman he's never met, Cullen seeks to end what he thinks are lyrium dreams.   When he finally meets her in the Fade he discovers her identity, only making her all the more mysterious.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In His Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> A continuation of the as yet unfinished "Tales of the Inquisitor and Her Commander." Though, it is not necessary to read the other story, as this one will stand on its own. But, the two stories will meet up eventually.
> 
> All of my Dragon Age stories take place in the same universe with the same characters. Thus, my Hawke and Fenris in "Beholden" are the same Hawke and Fenris in this story.
> 
> *As of yet (3 chapters posted) it isn't smutty. There will be smut eventually. I promise.

Cullen awoke, covered in sweat, his heart throbbing in his temples. He sat up, rubbing his hands vigorously over his face trying to scrub the image from his mind. Her, again. A woman with hair, black as the ravens in the rookery, streaming across his arm, her head pillowed on his shoulder, her hands fingering his tawny chest hair. Her laugh echoed in his head, hauntingly. As did the way she said his name, her voice lingering on the “L” for just a moment too long.

He could see her, walking the halls of Skyhold, cajoling with Varric, listening to Cole tell her of the most recent patient in the infirmary, drinking with Bull, doting upon Dorian. She belonged here. Yet, she was nowhere to be found, coming to him only in his dreams.

His morning erection throbbed against his smallclothes at the memory of her fleeting fingertips strolling across his nipples. Some mornings he took care of it before getting out of bed. But, his frustration level was already too high this morning. He gritted his teeth, threw off the covers, and got dressed for a day’s work.

  


Rain pelted him in the face when he opened his door. Frowning, he removed the gorget and breastplate that he insisted on wearing daily. He could always make a squire clean and polish it later. But, they never did a good enough job for him. He ended up cleaning it himself again, every time. Today, he would save himself the trouble. 

With his chin tucked, and his fur pulled up over his head he strode across Skyhold towards the war room. The Inquisitor was already there, sipping hot coffee from her mug, going over this morning’s missives with Leliana and Josephine. Zunyla Lavellan seemed to be exactly what their rag tag group of optimistic radicals needed. He admitted to doubting her when she first showed up. A Dalish elf who was an apostate mage, or would have been were the Circles still standing, came in and drew this Inquisition together. She was pleasant, smiling often, considerate of others, and reliable. But, something about her wasn’t quite right, and he didn’t know why. He had yet to find a way to trust her. 

Unsurprisingly, she had been spending most of her time with Solas, he noticed. Cullen had a good rapport with the Inquisition’s Fade expert, and decided to talk to him about it.

Cullen found Solas in his quarters on the bottom floor of the rotunda. Solas had painted the high walls in colorful murals. Wolves ran amok. Circle towers stood in silence. A radiant sun washed over a chantry. Cullen was sure there was meaning in every element, but had neither the time nor the patience to begin deciphering the elf’s code.

“Ah, Commander,” Solas greeted him as he approached his desk. “To what to I owe this visit?”

“Solas, I wandered if I could have a word with you, in regards to our Inquisitor,” Cullen told him.

Solas closed the book which he was reading and motioned for Cullen to take a seat. “But, of course. What is it about her that troubles you?”

“That you know she gives me trouble speaks volumes to your person. I feel very little happens in Skyhold without happening upon your ears. You are ever watchful, aren’t you?”

“Only to that which is of some import. The Inquisitor and her officers are certainly worthy of my scrutiny,” Solas said, with an amiable smile.

“Ha! Well, I hope we’re living up to your standards then?” Cullen asked.

“What matters is that you’re living up to your own standards, Commander,” Solas replied.

Cullen bowed his head. “As of late, I feel that I am not.”

“Do tell,” Solas said, encouraging Cullen to continue.

“Inquisitor Lavellan . . . at every turn she seems to be putting forth all of her efforts into our cause. She has flourished as a diplomat, persevered as a warrior, and proved to be a fair adjudicator.” Cullen listed her accomplishments thinking those should be reasons enough to trust in her.

“But . . .” Solas said.

“But, I find myself uneasy around her. I’ve noticed that the two of you spend quite a lot of time together. And, I was wondering if you could perhaps provide me with some insight.”

“What is it about her that makes you uneasy? Her certainty? Her ability to make quick calls of judgment? Or the fact that she is your superior?” Solas asked.

“I think it comes down to the fact that I feel as if she holds all of our fates in the palm of her hand. And that hand glows with the very power of the thing we’re trying to stop,” Cullen answered.

Solas nodded. “You’re right, Commander. I advise that you spend some more time with her. Get to know her. It is the only thing to quell your fears. But, something else troubles your mind these days, does it not?”

Cullen laughed nervously. “Everything else troubles my mind these days. The lyrium dreams especially, I haven’t been sleeping well because of them. I talked to Cassandra about them. She’s quite understanding.”

“If there is anything I can do, please let me know.”

“Wait, Solas are you saying there’s something you can do to help ease my lyrium withdrawal?” Cullen sat there, astonished. He should have thought of it earlier, that the elf who had mastered the Fade may be able to help ease the pain of the lyrium dreams.

“Of course there is,” Solas answered. Dreams take place in the Fade. And I am a Fade Walker. Tonight, stop by before you retire for the evening. I’ll have a draught for you to take before you go to bed. If nothing else, it will answer some questions for you.”

Cullen stood, extending a hand to the elf. “Thank you.”

“I only hope that you will be thanking me tomorrow. The Fade is unpredictable, as you know.”

  


The Keep was awash in shadows as Cullen walked back to his quarters that night. A full moon was rising, and the shadows were long. He could hear the rustling of the autumn leaves blowing in the gentle breeze, the soft nicker of a horse in the stables, the drumming of boot heels against a stone wall.

Cole sat on the parapets overlooking the merchants’ courtyard, legs dangling over the crenellation. He rolled the wide brim of his hat in his fingers. Cullen had a soft spot for the boy. Many people in Skyhold treated Cole as a pariah. Granted, he came into this world as a spirit, perhaps even an abomination. But, Cullen could not help but be reminded of himself, a young boy new to the Templar Order searching for his place in this world.

Cullen hopped onto the battlements, taking a seat by Cole. “You can really see everything in Skyhold under this moon, can’t you?”

“Everything that is outside can be seen, yes. But, I cannot see what is inside the walls. Can you, Commander?” Cole asked.

Sometimes, he forgot how literal Cole could be. “No, I can’t see inside the walls either.”

“I did not think so,” Cole responded.

“How are you, Cole?” Cullen asked.

“Oh, I am well. I can still hear her, though. She finds you. You don’t hear. What once was . . . should be . . . must be again. Reaches for you. Can’t hold on. Not really there.” Cole unrolled the brim of his hat, put it on his head, and hopped down. With an odd smile on his face, one that looked like it belonged to someone else, he looked up at the Commander. “Rest easy, Cullen.”

As he watched Cole walk towards the tavern Cullen tried to shake the feeling he got every time the boy dove into his thoughts. He always found it unsettling but, tonight he wasn’t surprised. He thought about those dreams frequently throughout the day. He hoped that Solas was right. Tonight, he would drink the potion and pray to Andraste for some answers.


	2. Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen discovers what Solas' potion was really meant to do.

She hovered in the green spectral mist, surrounded by four demons: envy, fear, despair, and another he did not recognize. Slowly, the demons began changing form. Now, she was encircled by Inquisitor Lavellan, Corypheus, a grey haired gentleman wearing mage robes, and someone who looked alarming like himself. They were taunting her as she writhed, fighting against invisible bonds. Her hair was stuck to her face, obscuring most of it from his view. But, he knew it was her, the woman he had been dreaming about for months.

He drew closer merely by thinking about it. Perhaps he was in the Fade. 

The figures approached her threateningly. Their arms were out, their hands claw-like, their eyes glowing green.

“Leave her alone!” he shouted. His sword appeared in his hand. He found his shield strapped to his arm. The lion head helm covered his face. 

As the demons approached him he summoned his old templar training, on pure instinct. The mage disappeared into a cloud of green mist as Cullen purged him with a spell. The Inquisitor followed in a cylinder of white light. Corypheus and the demon using his own form still approached.

With the demons’ concentration broken she was able to escape her bonds. A tall, thin golden staff appeared in her hands, adorned by the elegant form of a woman’s body. She lowered it at the demon Corypheus, who then disappeared amidst a glowing blue circle. Only the demon of himself was left. It laughed at them, mimicking his own laugh, but corrupting it into something inherently evil sounding.

“You don’t know which of us to fight, do you Inquisitor Trevelyan?” the demon asked her, it’s voice sickeningly familiar.

“I will always know him,” she answered. “Cullen calls me Isabeau.” She fired a bolt from her staff at the demon, who disappeared in a sparkling cloud of purple lightning.

Cullen dropped his sword and shield. Then, he removed his lion helm letting it, too, clatter to the ground. He ran to her, reaching her in far fewer strides than he suspected.

She opened her arms to embrace him. Without hesitation he wrapped his arms around her, holding her to him.

“Cullen, I knew you’d come for me,” she said, sagging against his chest. Her voice hitched. “How long has it been? It’s so hard to gauge time here. It feels like both forever and yesterday, since you’ve held me.”

He caught her weight as she fell into him, tucking her head beneath his chin, a reaction that felt alarmingly familiar. He breathed in the scent of her hair, combed his hands through it where it fell down her back, leaning into her warmth. “You know me. Who are you?” he asked, after several long moments.

She pulled away. Her smile faded. “What? Cullen . . . it’s me . . . Isabeau.” 

He didn’t think it was possible for her to look any sadder, but she did as he stared at her blankly.

“You didn’t come to rescue me. You’re not really here.” She bowed her head with slumped shoulders, covering her face with her hands.

His heart hurt for her as he watched her sob silently into her palms, wavering on her feet. Reaching out, he gathered her into his arms again, holding her to him, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, which made her cry even harder.

Bunching up his tunic in her fists, she embraced him in return, trying to stem the tide of tears.

He had so many questions. Where did he start? “Can you please tell me what is going on?”

Shaking her head, she took a few deep breaths in through her nose, and out through her mouth, as she wiped her eyes. “I’m stuck in the Fade. I don’t know why, or how. The last thing I remember is drinking from the Well of Sorrows. Morrigan, Solas, Varric, and Bull were with me. Morrigan and I argued.” She looked up at him, dejectedly. “I am the Inquisitor, Isabeau Trevelyan.”

“The Inquisitor’s name is Zunyla Lavellan.” He dropped her hands, taking a step backwards. “How do you know me?” 

“Cullen . . .” She hesitated, searching his eyes. “You saved my life. You pulled me out of the avalanche back in Haven. We . . . I l-l-l—You don’t remember anything?” she asked, her voice shaking.

He shook his head. “No. That never happened.” He watched as she struggled to keep her composure. “But, I dream about you every night. I’ve spent months waking up with the taste of you still on my lips, the scent of your hair fresh in my mind: elfroot and lavender. I know your touch. I can almost feel your warmth on the pillow next to me when I wake up. Why are you haunting me?”

“Ha! Haunting you? I’m sorry if that’s how it feels.”

“Perhaps that was a poor choice of words on my part. I apologize,” he said. “I get more disappointed every morning that I wake without you by my side.”

“Maker’s breath, I miss you so much,” she admitted, tears forming in the corners of her eyes again.

“Why?” He reached up, cupping her cheek, rubbing his thumb over her lips. “Please, tell me why I miss you too.”

“We’ve spent many nights together. Waking up, rolling over to run my hand across your chest, or tracing that scar on your back, pressing a kiss to it—it’s my favorite way to start our day.” She sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. 

He pulled a handkerchief out of the pouch on his belt, handing it to her.

“I knew you were going to do that,” she said, smiling again, wiping her nose.

Everything in front of him started to dissolve into a black cloud, including her. He pulled her into his arms once again, trying to cling to her. “Isabeau, don’t go!” He said, frantically raising his voice.

“Cullen, don’t leave me in the Fade!” 

  


He startled awake, sitting straight up, covered in sweat, though the morning air was cool. He wiped his hands roughly across the tears in his eyes. Running a hand through his disheveled hair, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and hastily got dressed. Surely Solas would have more answers for him. 

Cullen did not fail to notice the stares he received as he ran across the courtyard in only his trousers and his shirt. Thankfully, it was only dawn and most of Skyhold was still asleep. Solas was awake however, and taking his morning coffee by the fire in the great hall with Varric and Dorian.

“She’s trapped in the Fade! You know, don’t you? That’s why you sent me there, to find her. Do you know her? Do remember Isabeau?” Cullen’s voice was much louder than he had intended. The guests at the other tables looked in his direction, politely looking away when he looked up. He pulled out a chair and sat down in front of the elf.

“Tell me what you know,” Cullen demanded, much more quietly. “Please.”

Varric stood, mug in hand. “I think this is where we excuse ourselves, Sparkler.”

“Hush,” said Dorian. “Just be quiet and pretend like we’re not here. Maybe they won’t notice.”

Solas sipped his coffee. “Stay. Everyone will need filled in on this sooner or later. Commander, I take it that you’ve met Isabeau Trevelyan, yet still have no memories of her.”

“That’s the thing. I dream about her every night! I dream about waking up with her in my arms, running my fingers through her hair, waiting for her at the window hoping she’d walk through the gate at any moment. I just don’t know who she is. Please, tell me what in the Maker’s name is going on!” Cullen looked at Solas, pleading with him.

Solas met Cullen’s heartsick eyes. “I have been trying to figure it out for months. I have been trying to find her in the Fade. I have failed where you have succeeded. I knew she had to have been looking for you, reaching out to you from the Fade through your dreams. When you confirmed it yesterday, I thought you’d be able to find her since you would both be looking for each other. I was right, thankfully. What did she say to you?”

“She was very upset that I didn’t know her,” Cullen said, running a hand over his face. “Her pain, it was so great. I could hardly stand it. She said that she was the Inquisitor. And, she asked me not to leave her there. I’ve already let her down.” Cullen held his head in his hands. 

Varric put a steaming hot cup of coffee in him.

“Thank you, Varric.”

“No problem, Curly. So, two Inquisitors?”

“Yes,” Solas answered. “Somehow, there are two Inquisitors. Inquisitor Trevelyan ended up caught in the Fade after drinking from the Well of Sorrows, an ancient elven pool of knowledge hidden amongst the ruins in the Arbor Wilds. Morrigan, Varric, the Iron Bull, Isabeau, and I followed a lead to take down the Red Templars. We had intended to attack Samson there. We didn’t make it that far. Samson disappeared into the temple while we were left behind to face Abelas, an ancient elven guardian of the well.

Isabeau and Morrigan argued over who was going to drink from the well. We were afraid that Samson would drink from it, gaining knowledge that might help tip the scales in favor of Corypheus. Morrigan argued that she had the education to deal with the knowledge that the well might give. Isabeau refused to let any information that could influence our success fall into the hands of another. She immersed herself in the well, and drank. 

I woke up in Haven. The Temple of Sacred Ashes had just been destroyed. The victims from the conclave were strewn across the ground. Before I could even be sure what was happening, I saw a young elven woman, who is now our Inquisitor Lavellan, emerge from the rubble. I helped her out, took her to Cassandra, and went back looking for any sign of Isabeau. I found nothing of her. I recognized the bodies of her father and brothers, based on their rings. They each wore the family crest. She was not among them, Commander.”

Cullen cradled his mug in his hands, bowing his head low over the rising steam. “I think I’m in love with her,” he said softly.

“Very much, from my understanding,” Solas tried to console him.

“So, you are the only one who remembers her?” Cullen asked.

“And Cole. He’s been quite upset that you do not,” Solas told him.

“That explains his behavior, somewhat,” Cullen responded.

“Chuckles, are you telling us that we’ve already lived through the Inquisition once, with this Inquisitor Trevelyan. Except nobody else remembers her?” Varric asked.

“That is it, precisely,” Solas affirmed.

“Why?” Dorian asked, joining the conversation.

“I know not. Your guess is as good as mine at this point. I have found nothing to lead me to finding an explanation as to why any of this is happening. I have told you all I know.” Solas took another sip of his coffee.

Dorian tipped his cup, finishing his coffee, and set it gently down on his saucer. “Well, it appears that we have an Inquisitor to rescue. Best we bring this to the attention of our other Inquisitor, so that she can get us back into the Fade. And while we’re at it, we can rescue Hawke. Sound about right, Varric?”

Varric drained his mug next. “Yep. All in a day’s work. I’ll write to Fenris. Let him know the good news.”

“When you make it sound that easy, I feel rather optimistic. It makes me think that I should have told you gentlemen months ago,” Solas said.

Cullen stood, abruptly, knocking over his chair. “The love of my life is trapped in the Fade and you waited months to tell me?”

“What exactly was I to tell you? ‘Excuse me, Commander. You don’t know her, but your lover has disappeared, and we are now reliving events that have already come to pass once before. Let us tell everyone else, rally the troops, and such. Come on. Be quick about it.’ I didn’t exactly think that would go over well,” Solas replied.

“My apologies. You’re right. It wouldn’t have made any sense. I had to find out for myself. I suppose now that I know, I’m just anxious to get her out of there.” Cullen rubbed absently at the back of his neck.

“We will,” Solas nodded. “We owe it to her. She has never failed us yet.”


	3. We Need Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen and Solas inform the Inquisition team of the existence of Inquisitor Trevelyan, and find out who is willing to risk their life to rescue her from the Fade.

Cullen insisted that the team was gathered into the war room. Solas, Varric, Dorian, Leliana, Josephine, Cassandra, the Iron Bull, Sera, Cole, Vivienne, and Blackwall stood around the war table, waiting for someone to tell them that what they were doing here. Cullen cleared his throat as Inquisitor Lavellan opened the door.

She turned around, staring at everyone wide-eyed as she closed it behind her. “What? What did I do? If this is a surprise party, you guys forgot to yell ‘Surprise!’ No? Not funny? What is it? Who died?”

“Everyone, please take a seat. I have a feeling that we’re going to be here for awhile,” Solas began. “Commander?”

“A new mission has come to our attention, one I believe to be of the highest priority,” Cullen explained.

“What in the Maker’s name could be so important that it has circumvented my ears, I wonder, Commander?” Leliana asked, her eyes narrowed.

“We have news of the Inquisitor,” he announced.

Zunyla Lavellan raised her hand; the anchor glowed brightly green. “Umm, I’m sitting right here.” 

“Not you. Another Inquisitor. One who came before you,” Cullen said.

“Ameridan? The one who has been dead for hundreds of years. We had some news of artifacts coming from the Frostback Basin last month,” Josephine informed them. “I sent Scout Harding to follow up on it. She has not yet returned.”

“No. Inquisitor Trevelyan,” Cullen told them.

A big, broad smile broke out upon Cole’s face. “You heard. Growing hopeless, no one knows where I am. Afraid. Lonely. He will remember. Tell Cullen, Cole.”

“Inquisitor who?” Zunyla asked.

“Trevelyan,” Cullen answered, getting frustrated.

“The Trevelyans died in the conclave,” Cassandra pointed out.

“Not Isabeau Trevelyan,” Solas said, standing.

“Frightened. Dark. Jagged rocks. Wet, everything is wet. Demons everywhere. One looks like my father. Not my father. Doesn’t have his eyes. Must find Hawke. We were going back for her. Can’t stay. Not forever. Miss him too much.”

“Still creepy, Kid,” Varric said.

Cole smiled and nodded.

“Who exactly is Isabeau Trevelyan,” Blackwall asked.

“She was our Inquisitor, before Zunyla came along. Everyone here knows her. Cole and I are the only ones who remember her however. That was until Cullen started having dreams of her, memories she was sending to him from the Fade.”

After Solas had recounted the entire story to the team, everyone sat quietly for several long moments.

“So, you’re saying that you and the Inquisitor, this one, will find a way to open up a way to get all of you physically into the Fade. Then, while you’re there, on an infinite plane that is designed to confuse every soul in it, one that can be different for every single person, you’ll find the other Inquisitor, and Hawke, and bring both of them back,” Vivienne clarified.

“Bugger that,” Sera exclaimed. “I’m not going to the Fade for some wanker I’ve never even met!”

“It sounds dangerous, if you ask me. Foolish even,” Blackwall said.

“I must agree with the Warden on this,” Vivienne added. 

Bull shrugged. “I’m in. Hawke stuck her neck out for us. Doesn’t feel right to abandon her. And this Isabeau must be worth it if the wise elf vouches for her, and the Commander is this torn up about it.” 

“Will we need two teams? I volunteer to lead the team to find Hawke. I just ask that we wait for Fenris to get here. Should be any day now. I know he’s close,” Varric said.

Cassandra shifted in her seat uneasily. “Why don’t any of the rest of us remember her, Solas?”

“That I cannot say. My only guess is that it has something to do with a connection to the Fade. I have spent a good portion of my life in the Fade. And Cole is still a spirit, human as he may seem walking around in that body. I cannot say that anyone else will remember her at all, truthfully,” Solas told her.

“Why should we bother bringing her back at all. We have an Inquisitor, who’s doing a tremendous job, I might add,” Leliana complimented.

Zunyla smiled. “Aw, thanks Lil. But, that’s a good point. Why do we need her. You have me now.”

Cullen cringed, silently. He was losing this battle.

Varric stood to add his voice to the debate. “Hawke is my best friend. I would do anything for the chance to rescue her from that place. Picture your best friend, right now. Picture them in your head, in trouble, scared, alone. Would you go rescue them?”

“Yes,” Dorian answered without hesitation, diverting his eyes away from Bull.

“Fuck yeah, I would,” Bull grunted.

“Of course,” Cassandra nodded, placing her sword on the table.

Bull added his war hammer, Dorian his staff. Varric placed Bianca with the rest of the arsenal. Cullen laid his sword next to the crossbow, Solas put his staff beside it. 

They all looked at the Inquisitor.

“We’re just waiting on you, Boss,” said Varric. “Nobody else can get us in and out of there again.”

“I’ll go, but only if Leliana or Josephine will agree with the idea. I want this vote to go the way any of our other votes go,” Zunyla said, yet to make up her mind.

“She too is our Inquisitor, ladies,” Solas reminded them. “She may know valuable information about the enemy, information no one else knows. None of us know what she learned from the Well, or if it is even there now for us to try to relearn. Not only is she a priceless member of our team, she is exceedingly important to our Commander.”

Everyone in the room turned to Cullen. He forced a smile upon his solemn countenance. “I’ve dreamt about her every night since the conclave. For months now she’s been trying to reach out to me from the Fade. I may not remember her, but I know I love her. I have to try.”

Leliana sighed. “Oh, for Andraste’s sake, yes. Yes, go retrieve this woman!”

Josie hugged her. “I knew you would come around. You have my vote as well. Just promise to bring everyone back in one piece. I would hate to have to explain this to the public.”

Solas looked to Zunyla. “I think it best if we spend the next few days together studying the Fade. Getting everyone in and out of the Fade physically is going to be incredibly difficult, something neither of us have done on purpose as of yet. It will take practice.”

Zunyla smiled, blushing ever so slightly. “As you say, O wise one!”


	4. Two Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fenris receives a letter from Varric.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't touched this fic in over a year. I'm sorry. But, to anyone excited about a new chapter, or anyone just catching it for the first time, THANK YOU! Reading all the old comments made my day. I have another chapter already started. I hope to keep on keeping on and finish the story this summer.

Fenris sat, a letter in each hand. One he had opened months ago. It read:

  


“Hey there, Elf,

There’s no easy way to say this. I have some bad news. Somehow, while battling the Wardens at Adamant Fortress, we got sucked into the Fade. Physically, that is. Scariest shit ever. I can’t explain it. I don’t know if anyone can. On our way out we were attacked by this beast, blocking our way. Things weren’t looking so good.

The Grey Warden, Alistair, volunteered to stay back to fight the thing, giving us enough time to get away. Hawke wouldn’t let him. She said the Wardens were too important, and too few. She shoved him out of the way, and ran towards the monster, her staff held high. The Inquisitor grabbed my hand, pulling me back through with her, out of the Fade. There was nothing I could do.

I have no words. Scarlet got left behind. I am beyond sorry.

-Varric”

  


The grief he felt when he read the letter was unbearable. He remembered collapsing to the cold stone floor, in a cave, somewhere in the middle of Maker forsaken Thedas. He didn’t know how the raven found him. 

He had been dreaming about her, every night since he got Varric’s first letter. She was always looking for him, calling out his name. Often, he woke up in a cold sweat, struggling through painful shortness of breath. The first few days he’d sit with his arms wrapped around his knees, shaking uncontrollably, crying like a lost child. Somehow, it got easier as time passed. Not that he missed her any less. 

Every single day he thought about her, wished he would have married her before they parted ways. He wondered if Carver knew, or Aveline. Hopefully Varric would tell them. He couldn’t.

It had been months, and to this day he woke up every morning thinking about saying goodbye to her.

  


“Fenris, red lyrium has the taint. The Warden Commander is looking for a cure for the Calling. She’s trying to find a way to stop the taint from taking hold of a person. It should cure you too. You must go with her. Alistair is going to meet me at Skyhold. He’s also going to go help the Inquisition. They need us right now.”

She touched his face, pushing the long hair out of his eyes, tracing his cheek with her fingertips. He turned his hand into her palm, planting a kiss there. Taking hold of the back of his neck, she stood up on her tip-toes to kiss him. 

“I love you,” she said against his lips.

“Come back to me, Scarlet,” he said against hers.

  


She didn’t.

  


~~~

  


Now, another letter had arrived from Varric. He turned it in his fingers, still unopened. It was delivered by courier, along with a leather pouch for the Warden Commander.

It couldn’t get any worse, he thought, deciding to break the wax seal.

  


“Hey there, Elf,

I don’t know where in Thedas you are these days, but I need you to get to Skyhold. And I need you to be here as soon as possible, like in the next few days soon. I have some good news. Now, don’t get your hopes up too much, but we’re heading back into the Fade. We’re going to rescue Hawke and our Inquisitor, our other Inquisitor. Long story.

Sure, I guess there’s a chance it won’t work. I can at the very least get you into the Fade. If nothing else you can choose to stay there and spend the rest of your life looking for Hawke. But, I’m telling you we’re going to find her. And we’re going to get her out. I won’t let them leave without you.

-Varric”

  


As he tried to read the letter again, he realized his hands were shaking. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, he stared at the words, “We’re going to rescue Hawke.”

The only problem: he was easily a week’s journey away from Skyhold. How was he going to make it in time?

**Author's Note:**

> Stay tuned: Fenris will be making an appearance! 
> 
> Scarlet Hawke and Fenris appear in my story "Beholden." If you want to find out what happens in the first half of their tale you can find it here:
> 
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/3977293


End file.
